4 steps to getting to know me better
_just me_
_just me_
_just me_
_just me_
_just me_
_just me_
_just me_
10:47 PM
God damn it. Im almost 21 already. Is it so hard to trust that I can damn well make my own decisions? arrggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... ANGRY.
12:38 PM
专属天使 by Tank
我不会怪你对我的伪装
天使在人间是该藏好翅膀
人们愚蠢鲁莽而你纤细善良
怎能让你为了我被碰伤
小小的手掌厚厚的温暖
你总能平复我不安的夜晚
不敢想的梦想透过你的眼光
我才看见它原来在前方
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望
小小的手掌大大的力量
我一定也会像你一样飞翔
你想去的地方就是我的方向
有我保护笑容尽管灿烂
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望
要不是你出现
我一定还在沉睡
绝望的以为生命只有黑夜
没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
你是我的专属天使
唯我能独占
没有谁能取代你在我心上
拥有一个专属天使
我哪里还需要别的愿望
To a certain 专属天使, thanks for everything.=)
3:23 PM
Went with my mom to the bank again today to settle my school fees. AUD 7,600 dollars to be exact...a f***ing amount of 9000 plus dollars to be exact. I don't know why, but somehow felt that i was carrying a weight/burden of 9,000 dollars when i left the bank. Not a good feeling, living your life in guilt and carrying a heavy burden. But i cant complain about it, cos i think my mum has carried heavier burdens for the family and she never once complained about it. All i can do now is to be strong. Wish i could find a way to break the news to her. Feel horrible for being such a bloody liar. Biggest mistake, Biggest Fall, Biggest Lie. All this happened within the past year just like a whirl of tornado which toppled my life around, the striking of 4D, Me suddenly being in Uni, landing up in a course that was a wrong decision on my part, having the biggest fall in my life. Gonna take every ounce of me and turn it all around. I have a feeling this will be an interesting story to tell when i turn 80. Haha. BE Strong.
10:26 PM
Happy Belated Xmas EveryOne!.. =) Had an extremely sucky christmas eve, the only nice part about it is one of my favourite shows - Love, Actually showing on Channel 5. spent the rest of my day working on my assignment.. but i guess my friends made it all up on the actual day itself. Went with mh and fiona to marina bay for some steam boat buffet instead of our initial plan for fiona to have to horrendous task of teaching me and mh how to cycle and flying kites. I've always thought it will be fun to be with a group of people hanging out and just spend the day flying kites. Laughter, laughter and more laughter! =)
The main cook/ soup stirrer Fiona decided that instead of adding just plain eggs in our soup, we should have some form of chinese herbs in our soup and it turned out to be surprisingly yummalicious. And so we took turns running around the table cooking, stiring, scooping, and yelling when the oil spurt onto our skin. At the end of three hours, we were all siting down restless on the chair, like a bunch of 35-year-olds with all the tummys showing...(what a hideous sight) mh and fiona turned to green bean soup for rescue claiming that it actually helps to clear their stomachs cos they were really feeling so full. I was already planning in my mind how many times i need to jog to get rid of all those cellulites. Headed off for some bowling action after that. It was my christmas present to them since i did not prepare any presents for christmas xchange. =X. The two gurus had a hard time teaching me how to bowl. Got shot for not watchin Remy One on tv. I was trying so hard to get over a 50 but i sucked so much at it that i wanted to become a bowling ball myself and roll myself inside the holes together with all the bowling balls . Round 1 came and round 2... finally when we had a 3rd game, i had a strike!!!!! On my first bowl, 7 balls were down, I was like omg!!! When i turned around, Fiona and mh were clapping like crazy for me and suddenly there was one group of people watching us...-_-.. talk about pressure and did i mention they were all guys? bah...Decided to get fiona to do the strike down the last pin for me since i didnt wanna lose my chances for getting a strike. Boy.. that gurl can definitely work under pressure..
-- Gaya's 21st--
Poh Choo came over to my house first thing in the morning to wrap the birthday girl's present. Can you imagine four hands taking a freakin' 1 and a half hours to wrap a present? it's my fault cos im never good with hands on stuff. haha. And it wasn't as nicely wrapped as we expected it to be, turned out that we even had to cut off some of the remainding pieces that we have to 'cover the ugly parts' wahaha. Went for some church carnival with pc b4 we headed off for gaya's party .. almost about more than half of them turned out to be indians, except for our table and gaya's family on the chinese side. It almost felt like a tradional chinese wedding when gaya walked into the place hand in hand with her dad. The food was great, especially the lime juice .... ohhhh.... niceeeeeee. They even had a session where gaya's parents actually went up on stage to give testimonials abt gaya! cool... fast forward to the interesting part... i think gaya was right about how indians were being great party animals. Event ended with gaya's mom dragging the whole group of us(jan , me, suchi) on the stage to dance... of course, it wasn't on our own will. So we stood right behind, with me and poh choo being crazy as usual, trying to blend in with the curtains. Somehow, poh choo saw the chance to escape amongst all the smoky effects, (cos it was getting late and we didn't want to take the last train home).. but somehow we got pulled up on stage again cos gaya's mom caught us. bahhhh... what we didn't notice was that the whole group of people dancing on the stage had already moved down, so it was only left with the 4 of us, non-dancing people on stage with everyone staring. gosh... i really wished i had blended in with the curtains then. lol.
3:10 PM
I doing my ini-mainis between my mary janes and white birkenstocks look-alike slip ons this morning. White slipons won the race cos my feet still aches when wearing my mjs cos they are new! Little did i know that would be the last time i would be wearing my favourite slip-ons. =(
On with the story... fast forward to the NE16 - Seng Kang. While i was about to board the train, i felt someone step on my shoe....*again** - usually they are forgiven cos my frens are also victims of such situations whenever im around. At the point of time, my left feet was at the gap, and then somehow it fell into the god damn black whole. I looked at the people behind me, wondering who was the culprit. No Sorry's Nothing. No signs of embarrassment. BAH! I was so bloody astonished by the situation. Man.. i was recieving many unwanted stares. So i just walked with one shoe to my seat. Thinking of wat to do the next step. Decided to drop off at hougang instead of dhoby ghaut cos i figured it wouldnt be that crowded. ( I dont need 500 other people staring at me). Called mom to bring my other pair of shoes and got scolded. Thats when i got damn angry cos what happened was an accident. I didn't expect to loosee my shoes. So why the heck did she had to scold me for. BAH!!!! Loose my favourite shoes + Loose the culprit + got scolded for no reason + ppl giving me wierd stares ... = pissed to the max! On the way to meet mum, more and more people were lookin... But heck! I was too pissed to even bother. Usually i would laugh it off when something like this happen, but i simply just cant for this incident. Sigh.. i miss my shoes...=( bah... i just wanted to complain.
8:58 PM
* FOREWORDS - Hey there, this is an entry based on a true story that happened in my household over a period of around 14 days. Not advisable for people with bird phobia(like me).
Checklist
- a plastic bag/ medicated oil
- some cream, jus in case you start to itch after this entry.
PS . I'm not responsible for any of the side effects after this entry.
P.P.S Read at your own risk
*
- 2 weeks ago -
It all started off with me walking into the kitchen looking for food as usual when i thought i heard a bird chirping. It sounded like somewhere in da kitchen instead of being outside the house. Being the bird phobic that i am, i rushed out to tell my brother who somehow refused to budge from his foetus position on the couch cos he's watching some lame animae on tv. Later when we both finally gathered our courage to find out wat was going on, the chirping was gone again. (maybe at the point of time, the bird was thirsty or something) so it stopped. Relieved that my guess was wrong, i calmly forgot about the event. What we didn't know was tat my instincts were damn right.(should have bought 4d on tat day) on with the story ...
a few days later, my mom n i were spotted with so called mosquitoe bites. So we sprayed bygone ard the house and really did cleaned up every speck on dust, and also change the bedsheets in case of bed bugs. It was then, my mom being the hyper-alert person she is, together with her sixth sense, spotted this incy wincy tiny black insect crawling on her body. After a while, she discovered a few new 'mosquitoe bites' on her body. It was then confirmed tat the bites were the doings of the despicable tiny incys. They are really powerful even though they are much smaller than a normal ant itself. My mom then declared a new cleaning campaigne for us to counter attack the despicable incys. Even the pig, my brother volunteered to keep the house clean by mopping the floor. Well, tats cos he got bitten also. To our despair, none of our counter attacks worked. None! And the bites kept increasing everyday. the worst victims were me n my mom. if u wondering how come we didnt kill the insect the way we would to a normal ant when it crawled onto your body, its cos the insect is so incy weeny and the speed of crawling is so fast, tat it makes it impossible to catch them crawling. The other day i was messaging my fren on my bed n somehow i was looking at my hand and saw a black thingy fitting the description tat my mom gave me. Needless to say, it died a horrible horrible death. Cos i was covered with bites all over, i guess this brought out the sadistic side of me. I put it in hot boiling water though i think it was already half dead between my fingers. and i immediately felt so much better. believe me, it came to a stage whereby i wanted to set a trap for all those bloody insects and pound them to death with my grandma's pounder. You'll hear my sis or me or my brother complaining abt it during dinner, it was a hot hot topic, and tat was where the nickname xiao hei came from haha. then my mom started looking for all of xiao hei and his stupid friends around the house but they were so good at playing hide and seek. until we started smelling something stinky ard the house lately. My mom guessed tat something was dead in the house, n we all thought it couldn't be possible cos none of us are murderers and also, we dont knoe any ppl with the tendancy to kill, and it couldnt be any pet as well cos we didnt keep any around. So my mom looked around and when she opened the cupboard where we kept all da plastic bags and she nearly fainted. she was damn right. the source of the disgusting smell was found - a bird -. oh god im having goosebumps even when im typing now. By the time we found the poor bird, it all decomposed n turned white...and tthere were really black worms crawling..which was probably xiao hei's parents ..btw, it was in one of the plastic bags. No idea how the bird got in either. In the end, Mr. Incredible my dad saved the day, by volunteering to throw the plastic bag out. He's such a hero. Cos the smell was really, eeeeekkkkk. Love ya, daddy.=) I know of some bloody bastards out there who will make their wifes do such things. Well, just watch ur steps yeah, karma will catch up with you. But i know one thing for sure, my instincts tat day were right. The only logic we could come up with was this - maybe it happened during one of the days where we had all the strong wind and stuff. The poor bird probably was too weak to fly against the wind since the weather is bad now adays, so it got blown into our house, and somehow it tried to fly ... and got stuck in one of our bags. Awwww... so sad right. i felt bad for the bird and how it died. But at da same time, im also mad at xiao hei n his parents(the black crawlies) for making me itch all day long. Well, according to Mr. incredible, the bird was pretty small. (awww...) Note to the mommy bird - Please do not come flying into our house k? Im sorry i didn't have the guts to go find out where ur baby was when i heard him cry for help. Dun mind if you come into my dreams and peck me. But just DONT fly into my house one day and come looking for your kid. We do not need another bird in our plastic bags, and i don tink i'll survive another bite from xiao hei n neither will my heart survive if i see another bird of any kind in my house.
11:48 PM
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